So, here I am, it's 10:20 at night. I long to go to sleep, but my heart is longing to process the emotions of the Father. So here I am. You get to help me through it. I am (always) distressing about finances. The Lord has called us here to this place, he has guided us clearly, and yet I forget that he will also provide. You see, I am the bill payer. So this month, it looks a little more rough than others. I am contemplating all kinds of things that we should or should not do that are probably not the answers the Lord is looking for. AND, though I am not enslaved as the Israelites were, I find myself crying out, groaning for an end to this kind of strife. Fickle as the human heart is, I am quickly and patiently reminded of my study this week. . .
"God heard their cries and remembered his covenant promise to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. He looked down and felt deep concern for their welfare." Exodus 2:24-25
You see what happened here? First God heard. We sometimes have a hard time believing that he even hears the cries of our hearts. But rest assured beloved, he does. Because listen to what else he does, He remembered. The Father has made all kinds of promises to our family here in KC and he remembers those. He doesn't lead us somewhere only to abandon us kicking and screaming. HE remembers. Thirdly, he looked. I don't know about you, but to know that the face of the God of heaven and earth LOOKS at me is quite unbelievable. In my feeble and unsteady heart, when I cry out to him he looks at me. What a better way to communicate that he is listening, and that he longs for my heart to be at rest and content in him than to turn his FACE in my direction. Lastly, he felt deep concern for his people. He is not always going to answer our cries the way and the time that we propose. He will however BE there in the midst of the struggle. He will feel deep concern, enough to cause action on his part. I am reminded that after the Israelites cried out to him, he sent the redeemer Moses. He has sent the Redeemer Jesus to show his deep concern for me. And you know what?? To make it even better, notice what the Israelites do when they first hear of Moses' return and God's desire to bring freedom . . .
"The leaders were soon convinced that the Lord had sent Moses and Aaron. And WHEN they realized that the Lord had SEEN their misery and was DEEPLY CONCERNED for them, they all bowed their heads and worshiped." Exodus 4:31
May we all be in the place where after encounter with the heart of the Father, we will bow our heads and worship the God of the universe.
I stole this blog title from my friend Kayla, and though her heart is much more understanding of this idea, I am learning it in my own little way. You see, over the last couple of months John and I have made some really good couple friends. I don't know about you all, but sometimes it is really hard to find friends where both sides of the couple REALLY get along. We have lots of people we love to be with individually, and some that may become couple friends. But the ones we had come to know recently have been called away. They are going to spend three months in North Carolina and then go to Egypt. There is a very real possibility that we will see them in the summer of 2010 when we head there ourselves, but until then . . . we pass them on knowing the Lord will love them more than we can, laugh with them just as much as we did, and care for them in all ways that we ever could have. Thank you Lord for your speaking and working in our lives. We know that you know so much more than we do and for that reason, we trust your call on all of our lives. Thanks for the journey . . . .
I don't know if you can see them very well, but we looked out the back window at dinner the other night and caught these two sitting on our now not-so-alive (i.e. dead) tomato plant. I was thinking about my dear Grandmother and her love for most things natural. She often points out to me and my sons the birds that make their various appearances around this place. I am also so grateful for her knowledge and experience in all things plant-like. She has taken the time to teach me about flowers and vegetables alike. Her experience in such things is a lost art and I only hope to continue in such things as the Lord is willing and Gigi is able. It's an honor to have such amazing grandparents and great-grands in our family. What a heritage of love for Jesus that cannot be falsified or quantified. It is wonderful and I am humbled to be but a part of it.